Nobody told me that turning 30 will come with a lot of changes, not just physically but also mentally. The changes are mainly good, but I just didn’t see them coming. I feel like I’ve become more emotionally stable and (hopefully) more mature. I no longer feel desperate for the validation of others—and therefore tend to be less afflicted by the FOMO phenomenon and feel less lonely on occasions. What I didn’t see coming the most, however, is how going on dates in your 30s may be different from your 20s—even when you’re not married yet.
Just a year ago, when I was only 29, going on dates often entailed discovering new places to eat or visiting different exhibitions every week. It was really fun and our conversations became culturally rich. Fast forward to today, Agung and I mostly spend our dates going to the grocery store to stock up on food—and self-care products—for the week or even month ahead. However, not only is it not boring, we actually enjoy the experience of going grocery shopping together every week. Although, of course, grocery shopping isn’t the only thing we get up to on our dates, it has become an essential activity.
Nobody told me that turning 30 will come with a lot of changes, not just physically but also mentally. The changes are mainly good, but I just didn’t see them coming. I feel like I’ve become more emotionally stable and (hopefully) more mature. I no longer feel desperate for the validation of others—and therefore tend to be less afflicted by the FOMO phenomenon and feel less lonely on occasions. What I didn’t see coming the most, however, is how going on dates in your 30s may be different from your 20s—even when you’re not married yet.
Just a year ago, when I was only 29, going on dates often entailed discovering new places to eat or visiting different exhibitions every week. It was really fun and our conversations became culturally rich. Fast forward to today, Agung and I mostly spend our dates going to the grocery store to stock up on food—and self-care products—for the week or even month ahead. However, not only is it not boring, we actually enjoy the experience of going grocery shopping together every week. Although, of course, grocery shopping isn’t the only thing we get up to on our dates, it has become an essential activity.
📷 iPhone 11 12 MP, f/1.8, 26mm
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As someone who practices the zero-waste lifestyle, I often find it really hard to shop for groceries. Most grocery stores in this city—or even country, mind you—are still packed with plastic packagings. I guess when it comes to pre-packaged goods—such as instant noodles, detergent or skincare products—it can’t be helped, but often times even the fruits and vegetables often come in plastic packagings. Why tho?!?? I cannot fathom why pre-packaging fruits and vegetables is ever necessary, especially if they’re not pre-cut products. I mean, in these photos alone, you can already see chilis, carrots and ginger get wrapped in plastic for no good reason. They’ve already come pre-packaged by nature, why the plastic?!?
What I opt to do usually is to bring my own produce bags—which can come in various shapes and sizes, but for me, it’s usually in the form of a drawstring pouch—and choose fruits and vegetables that do not come unnecessarily pre-packaged. Instead of ripping off plastic bags every time I need to get fruits and vegetables weighed, I would put them in my reusable produce bags instead. That way, I don’t add to more single-use plastic waste that we have so abundantly produced thus far. Honestly, it’s such a simple choice and it doesn’t take a whole lot to make. All we really need is the intent—everything else will fall into place.
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As someone who practices the zero-waste lifestyle, I often find it really hard to shop for groceries. Most grocery stores in this city—or even country, mind you—are still packed with plastic packagings. I guess when it comes to pre-packaged goods—such as instant noodles, detergent or skincare products—it can’t be helped, but often times even the fruits and vegetables often come in plastic packagings. Why tho?!?? I cannot fathom why pre-packaging fruits and vegetables is ever necessary, especially if they’re not pre-cut products. I mean, in these photos alone, you can already see chilis, carrots and ginger get wrapped in plastic for no good reason. They’ve already come pre-packaged by nature, why the plastic?!?
What I opt to do usually is to bring my own produce bags—which can come in various shapes and sizes, but for me, it’s usually in the form of a drawstring pouch—and choose fruits and vegetables that do not come unnecessarily pre-packaged. Instead of ripping off plastic bags every time I need to get fruits and vegetables weighed, I would put them in my reusable produce bags instead. That way, I don’t add to more single-use plastic waste that we have so abundantly produced thus far. Honestly, it’s such a simple choice and it doesn’t take a whole lot to make. All we really need is the intent—everything else will fall into place.
The Joy of the Mundane
Enter Agung, the man who relishes on mundane scenes like this. Workplace scenes, diner scenes, supermarket scenes—you name it. He’s so smitten in the everyday that he would enjoy a film more if the film has scenes set at a workplace/diner/ grocery store. And he loves to spend time at grocery stores a lot. Now that I think about it, we used to steal time within working hour to head to the nearest mini-/supermarket for a little break. We would spend more time there just strolling through the aisles than actually buying what we came for.
Agung loves the grocery store so much, we’ve had multiple meals there. Our favourite hang used to be Plaza Senayan’s Food Hall eating area—which had the best food but sadly no longer exists—and now here in Gandaria City’s Lotte Mart ready-meal cafeteria.
There was a time in my life when I used to love grocery shopping. It’s not just about buying products or refilling your kitchen, but it’s about painting a picture of what the next week or month will be like with the kind of food and household items you buy at the supermarket.
It used to be a lot more fun when I had a kitchen of my own, cooked for myself and the supermarket was either a walkable distance away or easily reachable with a comfortable public transport. I get to shop for whatever I want whenever I want and shape a whole week-worth of meal for myself—and anyone else I would be feeding at the time. Unfortunately, that hasn’t been the case since I got back home. I mean, there was that recipe kick for a while, but it has since somewhat dissipated.
There was a time in my life when I used to love grocery shopping. It’s not just about buying products or refilling your kitchen, but it’s about painting a picture of what the next week or month will be like with the kind of food and household items you buy at the supermarket.
It used to be a lot more fun when I had a kitchen of my own, cooked for myself and the supermarket was either a walkable distance away or easily reachable with a comfortable public transport. I get to shop for whatever I want whenever I want and shape a whole week-worth of meal for myself—and anyone else I would be feeding at the time. Unfortunately, that hasn’t been the case since I got back home. I mean, there was that recipe kick for a while, but it has since somewhat dissipated.
Enter Agung, the man who relishes on mundane scenes like this. Workplace scenes, diner scenes, supermarket scenes—you name it. He’s so smitten in the everyday that he would enjoy a film more if the film has scenes set at a workplace/diner/ grocery store. And he loves to spend time at grocery stores a lot. Now that I think about it, we used to steal time within working hour to head to the nearest mini-/supermarket for a little break. We would spend more time there just strolling through the aisles than actually buying what we came for.
Agung loves the grocery store so much, we’ve had multiple meals there. Our favourite hang used to be Plaza Senayan’s Food Hall eating area—which had the best food but sadly no longer exists—and now here in Gandaria City’s Lotte Mart ready-meal cafeteria.
Tiga Mata Sapi t-shirt + tote bag // Noesa headband // thrifted skirt // unbranded sandals // photos of me by Agung
The truth is there’s magic hidden in the seemingly mundane nature of grocery shopping. Because it is so close to our daily fulfillment and sustenance, groceries can cut very close to home—especially when the habit surrounding it changes. When I first moved to Germany, I started out living with 18 people, then downsized to 6, and we used to go grocery shopping all together like little orphans. It was always such a fun and lively experience, what with our varying food preferences, palates and sense of humour. Months later, I had to move out to Halle (Saale) to live completely on my own for the first time. My first solo trips to do groceries were the most heartbreaking thing I had to endure—you could cut through the silence from the absence of my roommates with a knife. I ended up going from aisle to aisle in tears—not sure how I managed to buy what I needed with my eyes so blurry.
The same thing happened when I resigned from my first office—the office where Agung and I worked together. One of the saddest things about letting go of that was knowing we would never again steal time between working hours to go to the nearest minimarket. We had gone through a lot there—buy afternoon snacks, pick out drinks to go with dinner, steal away when there was a blackout, find a space to resolve our arguments, etc. So yeah, I guess if you look at grocery shopping functionally, it will seem pretty mundane—you pick out products, put it in the cart and pay for it—but, ultimately, the experience always nurtures something more emotional in all of us.
Okay, wow, I didn’t expect that one post about groceries to be so emotional,
but I guess I was right—groceries are emotional.
Do you agree?
Tiga Mata Sapi t-shirt + tote bag // Noesa headband // thrifted skirt // unbranded sandals // photos of me by Agung
The truth is there’s magic hidden in the seemingly mundane nature of grocery shopping. Because it is so close to our daily fulfillment and sustenance, groceries can cut very close to home—especially when the habit surrounding it changes. When I first moved to Germany, I started out living with 18 people, then downsized to 6, and we used to go grocery shopping all together like little orphans. It was always such a fun and lively experience, what with our varying food preferences, palates and sense of humour. Months later, I had to move out to Halle (Saale) to live completely on my own for the first time. My first solo trips to do groceries were the most heartbreaking thing I had to endure—you could cut through the silence from the absence of my roommates with a knife. I ended up going from aisle to aisle in tears—not sure how I managed to buy what I needed with my eyes so blurry.
The same thing happened when I resigned from my first office—the office where Agung and I worked together. One of the saddest things about letting go of that was knowing we would never again steal time between working hours to go to the nearest minimarket. We had gone through a lot there—buy afternoon snacks, pick out drinks to go with dinner, steal away when there was a blackout, find a space to resolve our arguments, etc. So yeah, I guess if you look at grocery shopping functionally, it will seem pretty mundane—you pick out products, put it in the cart and pay for it—but, ultimately, the experience always nurtures something more emotional in all of us.
Okay, wow, I didn’t expect that one post about groceries to be so emotional,
but I guess I was right—groceries are emotional.
Do you agree?